Like many others I suspect I found myself wanting to slow down and reflect during the season of Advent but also pulled at what seems an ever increasing speed towards Christmas. So far I have completed three speaking engagements this week, and am heading towards the week of wall to wall Carol Services, oddly I find in my new context that I am not preaching or presiding on Christmas Eve which I find particularly sad because the mid-night service is one of my favourites...
That said I am challenged this advent season not to make the coming celebrations my focus, but rather to focus upon not only the Second Coming of Christ but to see the signs of the kingdom as being revealed amongst us. I find myself encouraging folk to reconnect in a deep way with the presence of the Holy Spirit in their lives strengthening and empowering, comforting and guiding. To celebrate each "a ha" moment as a sign of God incarnate amongst us and within us, and to listen for his still small voice....
I find myself focusing beyond the manger and the cross ( not denying their importance) and even the resurrection right into the holy of holies in heaven where Jesus intercedes for us. I find myself drawn to remember the journey of his work within me, and to wonder at the fact that although I am still a mess and a muddle that has worked and continues to do a work of transformation within me, and I have told that story in different ways this week.
To be honest I find that God is speaking to my vulnerabilities in a fresh and wonderful way, he is reminding me that I am loved, that I am named precious and honoured in his sight, that I have been called, blessed and sent. I find myself challenged to find Christ at work within me and as I do I find his human givenness and vulnerability in the manger and on the cross, and his glorious resurrected and ascended strength and power going hand in hand. I find myself invited to love and accept myself in a fresh way knowing that love comes from him, and I find that I am challenged to share the depth of that love as I speak and share.
So what is going on? I think that I am finding my Advent observation being re-focused, instead of focusing on Christmas only I am called to look to the future but within, to sense the coming of Christ through God revealing signs and to long for more. I spent too many years trying to what I thought God wanted me to be, and what others wanted me to be ( or what I thought they wanted), as I find him at work in me I realise that none of this matters, what matters is that he loves me just as he loves all that he has made and that the time is coming when all WILL see that this is so...
I've run out of words now so I'll leave you with this:
