Eternal Echoes

advent calls...

advent calls us

beyond the manger

to lift our eyes,

hearts, minds, and souls

to the new day

approaching,

her signs are all

around us, and the Spirit

beckons those with

ears to hear and eyes to see

to point to her unveiling,

all is being made new,

the seeds of possibility 

are sown amongst us,

advent calls us 

beyond the manger

towards the light

of eternities day,

the price is paid,

the debt forgotten,

the door

stands open...

 

 

A step along the way...

I have spent part of the day talking to vulnerable folk, some of them are homeless others living in bed-sit accommodation or are living in temporary bed and breakfast accommodation. All of them attend our Wednesday morning and Monday night drop-ins, many of them find their way to other drop ins around the town during the week. Each time I listen to their stories I am struck by their ordinariness, struck by how one piece of bad luck or poor judgement can lead to a downward spiral, and I am left to ponder that this could so easily be me.

These folk have families, some have been professional people, others can simply remember how life became so intolerable where they were that at the time homelessness seemed a preferable option. One of our regulars loves to bless people as they come into the drop in, another will fetch anyone a cup of tea, and me I enjoy their company, I have got to know their names, I ask after their families and they ask after mine.

Today I was greeted with a hug and a kiss on the hand, I returned the hug, and gave Pete a kiss on the cheek, and I am becoming more convinced that some of the best gifts we offer are those of friendship and of touch. We can feed the bodies ( and a hot meal is available in the town everyday for those that need one), and we can help to provide warm clothes and shoes, but the holy moments come when we spend time listening, when we offer prayer together, when we hold a hand or return a hug, when we recognise the individual and our common humanity. Some days the whole thing overwhelms us and we feel that we cannot do enough, and the truth is that we can't, but then we catch the eye of one of our friends and hope sings out, each drop of difference, each act of kindness is a step along the way, and the best part is, is that in some way we are making the journey together. Today an ex-homeless person came to the drop in as a volunteer, he wanted to give something back, to help others on their journey. Surely God is with us....

i'm gonna look twice at you
until i see the christ in you

i'm gonna look twice at you
until i see the christ in you

when i'm lookin through the eyes of love
when i'm lookin through the eyes of love
when i'm lookin through the eyes of love
when i'm lookin through the eyes of love

i'm gonna look twice at you
until i see the christ in you

i'm gonna look twice at you
until i see the christ in you

 

advent longings...

to long, to wait, 

to long, to yearn,

to groan deeply

with sighs inexpressible,

to know there is more,

there will be more

than we now know,

when we  reach for wholeness,

brushing our finger tips

gently on the hem 

of glory,

and shiver with the hidden

power of it,

the day is coming,

is coming,

and the Spirit stirs our souls

to deeper longings,

deeper yearnings,

as S/he prays

and longs

within us...

Picture; Sunset on Blackpool Beach

a new day... (towards advent)

another time is coming,

a new day lies

just over the horizon,

a time when glory unveiled

will fill the skies,

when divisions 

will fall and fail,

the broken will be made whole,

the sick will be healed,

and tears will be no more

as we are wrapped in a blanket

of light and love,

the desert will bloom,

and the universe will sing

in glorious

awestruck harmonies

and we will be filled to the measure

with the goodness

and wonder of God

as S/he makes

a home

among us...

 

hope...

she will not

be silenced,

she will weave

her song

gently and persistently,

through counterpoint

and harmony

she draws

her golden thread

of light and life

raising our songs

refreshing our hearts,

enlivening our praises,

deepening our prayers

turning our laments

and sighs

towards new

Spirit breathed possibilities...

she will not be silenced,

she is not silent

to those with ears

to hear her voice...

"Hope" (1886) was painted by Victorian painter George Frederic Watts (1817-1904). It portrays a woman with bandaged eyes and broken dreams. She is sitting on top of a world that seems pitted against her, unable to see ahead, to look forward, but clutching in her hands a harp with all its strings broken save one. That one string of hope she strikes triumphantly, as she leans into the lyre and sends

 out into the darkness a beautiful melody that stirs the clouds and strews a star into the sky. You are seeing Watts' second rendition of the painting, which took out the star because it seemed to Watts too cheesy.

 

Sadness and the struggle for equality ( reflecting on The Anglican Synod vote)

I wake up this morning with a deep sense of sadness, much of it is for my friends in the Anglican Church, men and women who must be perplexed and bemused by the vote in Synod yesterday. Perplexed and confused not only because of the result but actually because there was a majority in favour of women becoming Bishops and very House voted for and yet a small group effectively blocked this momentous decision. So I am sad for them, but I am also sad about the message that this decision has sent throughout the country, it declares that the Church is irrelevant, and I say "the Church" rather than simply the Anglican Church because for the people in the street, the public who do not largely differentiate between on church and another The Church has declared that women are not fit for high office!

I am not being insulting to the public in this for the Church is seen as an institution, I can't count the number of times I've been called vicar and asked about my parish, I've even been mistaken for a Roman Catholic Priest, which left me more bemused than the one who greeted me so warmly!

So what is the message that has been sent?

1. The Church is out of date, and therefore irrelevant in 21st Century society where equality is expected if not always practiced, and critics rightly berate those who are seen to be against equality.
2. Following on from that the message is that women are unfit for leadership, as one tearful woman priest said yesterday apparently we're OK for arranging flowers and making tea, offering a shoulder to cry on, but this vote has insulted and undermined women priests, and I would add women in ministry everywhere.
3. That the "Old Boys Club" still has power; and while this may not be true as a number of those against women Bishops were women it has effectively made it so.
4. More worryingly for me it sends out all sorts of mixed messages about God, of course there have always been mixed messages about God, but I would like to ask whether this vote somehow portrays the undendered God as male? S/he is presented to us as male as Father throughout Scripture and yet there is much female imagery such as God nursing and nurturing Israel at her breast, we miss so much by wearing gendered blinkers.
5. A barrier has been erected where there should be none, the glass ceiling  ignores the trajectory of Scripture which is towards freedom and equality, within order yes, but who truly sees equality as disordered? 

To quote St Paul with all of his misogynistic, though often misinterpreted, writings he says this:

"²⁸ In Christ’s family there can be no division into Jew and non-Jew, slave and free, male and female. Among us you are all equal. "." (Galatians 3)

I finish a "letter by Nicola Slee and with another picture, a picture of the expectant Mary amazed and awed at what God has done within her dear brother Church, are you listening?

Dear brother Church

I name you "brother, not "mother"

for your leaders are mostly men

and your ways are still too patriarchal.

 

I want to live passionately

I will not hide my anger or my energy

Will you face your own?

 

I want to act effectively

I will not deny nor dissemble my power.

Will you admit your own and be willing to share it?

 

I want to think dangerously

I will not set limits on what is possible to ask say or explaore

Will you open the gates of learning you have been guarding and let others in?

 

I want to pray deeply

I will not hold any part of my life from the divine gaze

Will you plunge with me into the depths?

 

I will work with you

but I will not work for you.

 

I will walk with you

but I will not lead you, nor will I follow in your path.

 

I will weep with you and laugh with you,

but I will not feel for you,

you must claim your own passion and pleasure and tears.

 

I will offer you the fullness of my being,

but I will not sacrifice myself on the altar of your impossible demands.

 

Dear brother Church,

I am standing here as a woman struggling to be who I am,

I am speaking,

are you listening? 

And it WILL be!

Loved and known; prayer for a stillborn baby

formed in the secret

of your mothers womb

loved and known,

prepared for, longed for,

hoped for,

and dreamed of,

yet we hardly knew you

before you were gone

and a part of our hearts

goes with you,

and you will remain in our hearts,

precious child,

daughter and sister,

grandchild and niece,

God-child, and friend's child,

loved and known

before you even came to be,

go safely,

go gently,

go in peace

to the everlasting arms

where we will meet again,

and our tears

will be wiped away

as we are loved

and known...

Do we substitute performance for sacrifice?

Sometimes, just sometimes things come together in such a way that they zap you between the eyes...

Today I saw this from Naked Pastor;

I am left wondering how many of us see God like this, as a manipulative and controlling selfish deity who demands too much from us. Certainly I know from simply chatting with folk on a daily basis that this is how the message of the church is often heard. 

Yes, yes I hear the cries of protest, but just stop and ponder the image for a while ask yourself why guilt or transferred guilt are so often expressed or worse suppressed within the culture of church, and that feelings of guilt and a sneaky suspicion that they aren't healthy are amongst the things that drive people away from church. So I found myself left with a question, do we substitute performance for sacrifice? 

Let me unpack that a bit, do we feel that we have to live up to a certain standard, do we strive to do it and feel guilty when we fail, do we attempt to look right and be right and "do" right? Do we carry in our head a list of expectations of what it means to be a good Christian? Do we feel that in order for God to accept us that we must live up to these? 

Now I know again that there will be cries of protest and people will point me to Jesus sacrifice on the cross and declare all of this unnecessary... BUT I want to suggest that what we know and how we behave don't always match up, and that there is something about our human condition that wants to "get it right" and refuses to accept that we can't do it. Worse still corporatelywe subtly place demands upon one another to conform to what we understand a good Christian should be, and worse still so often it is so much a part of us that we don't know we are doing it...

Then I saw this:

Hebrews 10:11-25

Contemporary English Version (CEV)

¹¹ The priests do their work each day, and they keep on offering sacrifices that can never take away sins. ¹² But Christ offered himself as a sacrifice that is good forever. Now he is sitting at God’s right side,^[a]13 and he will stay there until his enemies are put under his power. ¹⁴ By his one sacrifice he has forever set free from sin the people he brings to God.

¹⁵ The Holy Spirit also speaks of this by telling us that the Lord said,

¹⁶ “When the time comes,
I will make an agreement
    with them.
I will write my laws
    on their minds and hearts.
¹⁷ Then I will forget
    about their sins
and no longer remember
    their evil deeds.”

¹⁸ When sins are forgiven, there is no more need to offer sacrifices.

Encouragement and Warning

¹⁹ My friends, the blood of Jesus gives us courage to enter the most holy place ²⁰ by a new way that leads to life! And this way takes us through the curtain that is Christ himself.

²¹ We have a great high priest who is in charge of God’s house. ²² So let’s come near God with pure hearts and a confidence that comes from having faith. Let’s keep our hearts pure, our consciences free from evil, and our bodies washed with clean water. ²³ We must hold tightly to the hope that we say is ours. After all, we can trust the one who made the agreement with us. ²⁴ We should keep on encouraging each other to be thoughtful and to do helpful things. ²⁵ Some people have gotten out of the habit of meeting for worship, but we must not do that. We should keep on encouraging each other, especially since you know that the day of the Lord’s coming is getting closer.

I was reading in preparation for preaching this weekend when vs 18 ¹⁸ When sins are forgiven, there is no more need to offer sacrifices... quite simply leapt out at me!!! Of course I know it, I preach it, but how often I have to ask myself do I accept and live it. I realise once again that on my own I don't and can't live up to or into the person that God calls me to be, but the wonder is that with him and by the power of the Spirit I can. 

Now I don't want to turn this into a full blown preach, but I ask the question about performance and sacrifice simply because I think that we cannot truly get our heads around the amazing truth that God is for us. I think we want to earn our way into God's affections because we too often want our own independence and we want to say that we have done it. How challenging is it to let go secure in the knowledge that we are loved and there is nothing we have to do but receive it? I suspect we find it very challenging, but there lies the way of freedom...

God does not say I love your therefore, he simply says I love you....

 

Too many expectations???

Our newspaper headlines are full of two new appointments, firstly and globally the news that Barack Obama has been re-elected as President of the United States, accompanied in some instances by exuberant headlines proclaiming hope and stirring the chant " four more years", but also by the prophets of doom, declaring that Americas future is now in doubt! The second appointment that is gaining much attention here in the UK is the announcement that Justin Welby is  to be Archbishop of Canterbury, this appointment too is drawing comment, so rejoicing and others critical.

As I read the articles and comments surrounding these two I am struck by the fact that we expect so much, and I wonder why we think that one individual can accomplish so much. So often it is easy to load leaders up with all manner of expectations and then refuse to support and encourage them on the way. Now I am not suggesting that we agree with every plan, vision and initiative, but that we do consider carefully the fact that most leaders, and I would suggest that many leaders are good, become leaders in order to advance the good of the people they serve, and that many leaders do see their role as one of service.

Now I know that there are dictators and power hungry despots but on the whole politicians, church leaders, community group leaders etc. etc. take on the roles that they do out of concern to see a better world, we may see things from different angles, we may disagree with their policies but when it comes to the sort of character assassination and questioning of motives that occupies so much space in the news and even in political campaigns I wonder if we have lost the plot.

Three of the things I often tell people in my minor leadership role are:

a. I am not the person who came before me and therefore they can expect that I will do things differently. 

b. I cannot do anything alone, I need help, prayer, support and encouragement.

c. There is some stuff that I am not good at, and I will need to find people to come alongside me, to lead in ways that I cannot lead.

I suspect that I am not alone in these needs, none of us is an island and all of us need encouragement, we also need creatively critical voices. Creative criticism is a criticism that seeks to build and not to destroy, creative criticism seeks the good of others and of the whole, and as I have said nobody of integrity accepts a leadership role easiliy or lightly ( though we should perhaps beware of those who do). 

So as President Obama steps into his second term in office, as Justin Welby takes on the mantle of Archbishop of Canterbury, as we elect Police Commissioners, Local Councillors MP's and other leaders including those in leadership roles in the church local and in the voluntary sector let's decide to pray for help and support them, and let's make our critisism positive and creative. It is easy to tear down, but that helps nobody! Let's be those who expect to participate rather than those who expect too much. As for those in leadership perhaps we would do well to follow the one whose example was to take a towel....

Prodigal.....

knowing I am known

I come, 

expecting judgement,

my knees tremble,

and my heart beats

wildly, as I quake

and tremble within,

I have come,

returned,

for my need is great,

I bring doubts and fears,

and carry self-condemnation

as a millstone

round my neck,

I come for I have nowhere

else to go...

+

but what miracle is this,

I am circled and enfolded,

by loves desire to love

that will not let me go...

+

yes, it was love that drew me here

+

again...

My dear children, let’s not just talk about love; let’s practice real love. This is the only way we’ll know we’re living truly, living in God’s reality. It’s also the way to shut down debilitating self-criticism, even when there is something to it. For God is greater than our worried hearts and knows more about us than we do ourselves.

(1 John 3: 19-20)