Eternal Echoes

New Years Eve

It feels like every other day except that there were no parking spaces to be had, I pulled up at Church to set up for the watch night service tonight and found the Car Park full...overflow from the supermarkets!!!!

At first I thought I'd be interupting a meeting or a party or even a funeral...but no only Iris doing the vacuming and so I traipsed in and out over her newly cleaned carpet bring in stuff for the prayer stations...bless her she was so gracious towards me.

So everything is set up for this evening, I hope it will be meaningful for everyone who comes no matter how few...

Here are some of the prayers we will be using

We believe in light beyond our seeing

Flowing forth from the flame of life in God

Who goes on creating in us, down through the ages of ages…

We believe in healing beyond our knowing

From Christ

Who stands close to the reach of our hand

And the pain of our struggle

Beyond the end of time

We believe in the energy of Gods Spirit

Stirring in our being

With a rhythm of courage and passion

Moving our feet to risk Christ’s way again

As those who are always called to be the humble witness

To the faithfulness of God

Lord in this New Year

Into our emptiness

Breathe your fullness

If we are discouraged

Bring us your hope

If we are afraid

Bring us your courage

If we do not know the way

Give to us your wisdom

For we are your people and you are our God

forever and ever

Touch points

I love this piece of clip art from Northumbria...it speaks of how we are all interconnected and involved in the lives of one another.

I was starting to get cross today as I brought my book downstairs with me and meant to sit and read, but have ended up working, doing house work and cooking...followed by an exciting trip to Tescos (I hate that I shop at Tesco so often!!!) and aslo to pay the car tax... but as I reflect that is OK because through the day I witnessed my life touching others.

I met some children out with their mum, they go to a school where I take assemblies they showed me their Christmas persents, at times like that I'm glad I know what it is like to be a mum...she was exasparated because her son had spent all his Christmas money while her daughter had saved hers. My boys (men now) do that, Jon bought a crazy shirt in London, Em and Jo can save to the point of meaness. And because of that smallthing we connected. I must remember that, that all of those things that frustrate and challenge me enable me to connect with others...so I will try not to pine for an ivory tower.

But now that things are quiet I will grab a glass of wine (we hid some) and my book and find a quiet space...might have to be the car!!!

Snow day

We had a day in the snow yeaterday Jo, Jon, Chris & Emma built and then demolished a snowman with some friends, more sophisticated now they videoed the whole thing; I wonder were they trying to capture a bit of something that says my childhood was made of days like this? As young adults we wathc them all struggling to both grow up and remain childlike at the same time...

Tim and I walked ...after throwing a few snowballs at the children who reciprocated! It was foggy and as we walked everything disapeared except for the path ahead of us, we couldn't see where we'd come from or where we were going to...bit like life I guess! Though we always have a take on where we have come from though I'm not always convinced we see behind us with real clarity!

I've been reading Brian Mclarens "Last word and the word after that."... it looks at the question of hell and how we Christians have preached Hell fire and brimstone to scare people into behaving, yet how Jesus went to those excluded on the grounds of morals and behaviour and drew them close eating with them and befriending them

We Christians use the whole doctrine of hell exactly as the Pharisees did! We're playing on the wrong side!Our concept of righteousness is like theirs-it's like we've missed Jesus whole point!-Brian McLaren

Wow, this really resonates in my soul, I love Jesus but sometimes we seem to be so harsh and hard in what we preach in the church...what if we have truly missed the point.

Family

Does anyone out there buy into the perfect family scenes portrayed on adverts...hmmm if life were able to be made right by eating Old El Paso or Bisto we'd eat nothing else...

Who smiles at cornflakes??? And who has a good day just because they've eaten the right variety???

My family has been going through some tough times over the last few years, we lost our house and had to move because of financial problems, Tim (my husband) had been made redundant twice in 2 years! Chris had been getting worse over the last few years and had his big op this summer, Paul and his wife splitup, now I hardly see my grandaughter, and my youngest stressed by all of this but especially having to move again has been selfharming (shes going for counselling now)... I wish I could fix stuff with bisto, or buy a magic wand... instead I will pray... finances have been tough before but we have never gone hungry or cold... illness come and go and so much prayer has been answered in Chris's life...he shouldn't be here even the Drs' say so.

I come out of all this confused and tired but knowing that God is with us, he is protecting us...I make loads of mistakes and am far from a perfect mum but I will keep on keeping on for I can't do anything else.

I hold onto Jesus words when all gets too much...

Matthew 11:28-30 (MsgB) 
    "Are you tired? Worn out? Burned out on religion? Come to me. Get away with me and you'll recover your life. I'll show you how to take a real rest. [29] Walk with me and work with me—watch how I do it. Learn the unforced rhythms of grace. I won't lay anything heavy or ill-fitting on you. [30] Keep company with me and you'll learn to live freely and lightly."

I want to learn free and light living, and a simplicity of life and to cultivate thankfulness for the small things instead of always striving for more and more...

  Thought I'd add a bit of sunshine after my last gloomy post...

It comes from a part of a picture by Mary Fleeson from the Northumbria Scriptorium... called Journey..check out their web-site

www.lindisfarne-scriptorium.co.uk

Lazy Day

It is snowing outside again and really cold, I haven't done much at all, a bit of wasshing and cleaning, a bit of eating, watched a really daft film... a real happy ending story... all about how families always win through in the end, as much as we agravate one another I guess I can see that wining through in my family...

I feel the need for space to think and reflect,. I'd really like a week to read and think without the bother of everday life... ideally somewhere hot. I don't do winter very well...S.A.D.S I think!

Ah well I'm sure there are more cheesy films to watch...tomorrow is another day, guess I need to start thinking about work soon though!

Chris

I have just posted a photo of Chris after his op this summer... looking back over the 12 weeks he was in hospital I can't help but wonder why, what purpose did it serve except to place us under huge stress.

Chris spent 6 weeks in ITU 3 of those weeks not knowing he was there kept alive by a ventilator kidney dyalisis and 15 different drugs. His leg may never recover and that was a side effect!!! So what happens to faith in all of this? I guess the answer is to hang on and hang in there. Chris is intact, still with both leg, and sense of humour... and compassion... if he can hang in there so can I.

I believe God has a purpsoe for each one of us, what I don't understand is why thigs seem so awful sometimes...

Family

What makes Christmas time so difficult?..I think it is expectations, expecting to all get on...expecting peace...expecting .... with a house full of 16-24's Christmas is strained and difficult, even though we all say we acknowledge a deeper meaning!!!

My wish is for this season to be over soon...

I hope one day things will change!

I need to ponder on how much of this stress is caused by me!

Celebrating Christmas

Well it seems that we have sucesfully delighted one set of parents and upset the others by giving them an alternative present of seeds and tools for an African family. Predictable really ...ah well!!!

We kind of enjoyed Christmas day in a chilled out way, no big hype or anything, less food and drink than in past years, a quiet game or two and a bit of TV watching, the morning service was short and sweet but meaningful ( I can say that even though we took the service!), it really does seem that the whole world pauses on Christmas day even the air seems different, perhaps it is the presence of angels reminding us of the day when heaven visited earth in the flesh.

We walked on the beach today, the sea air is wonderful, I want to regain a simplicity of life that we seem to have lost, to enjoy a cup of tea, to revel in the sea air, to be rather than to have and to gain... I guess that is my prayer for 2006, even though I know it is going to be a busy year as I start studying in Janurary, I pray for time to stop and grasp what God is saying nd where he is working, and for the courage to join in...

Wine TV and priorities

I'm drinking a glass of wine, was watching the TV when I realised that there was nothing on, so I've come to blog for a bit. I need to reconnect with my priorities somehow, to build on priorities...what do I want to do in 2006?

Grow, study and be more productive... I want to catch what is on Gods heart for me, and for those around me

I want to watch less TV and drink less wine...unless it is a really good wine with really good friends...