Don't misunderstand me in this- I believe slavery is wrong and pray and seek through any practical means I can to see it come to an end. But I also believe that the letter of Philemon calls us to look beyond the surface, to discover true freedom and accept true reconciliation...
These are my narrative musings...
I ran away it is true, I thought that freedom was what I was looking for- but freedom is not what it seems... for even free I was a slave... a run away slave is not safe anywhere...
I spent weeks hiding, travelling under cover of night, scrapping for food wherever I could... sleeping fitfully during the day, afraid of being found, of being punished... there was no dignity in my so called freedom...
It was early morning when Demas found me, I was sleeping in an Olive grove, he was taking an early morning walk he was seeking space to pray...
I was in a terrible state, hungry and dirty, he knew at once that I was a runaway slave. I was too tired to care about what might happen, at that point death seemed a welcome relief...
..imagine my surprise then when he took me home, helped me to bathe, gave me fresh clothes and spread a meal before me...
...I stumbled over my story, explaining my desire for freedom, all the while he listened carefully, and when I had finished he smiled slowly... perhaps he said I should take you to Paul, he will tell you what true freedom is...
..anything seemed better than capture, and Demas apparently had no inclination to turn me over to the authorities or collect a reward, so I nodded my agreement...
We set off then to visit this Paul, the man who would tell me about true freedom; another surprise awaited me, for when we reached the house where Paul was I noticed immediately that it was under guard... Paul the expert on freedom was a prisoner! I must have looked oddly at Demas, who simply smiled back at me, you'll see he said.
Paul was a small man, yet his voice had a confident authority as he welcomed me, he motioned for me to sit, and it was then that I noticed he was in chains...
Now he smiled, much like Demas had, as if they knew a secret beyond my imagination, he lifted his hands, "these" he said indicating the chains, "do not hold me!"
He asked me to tell him my story, and I repeated my desire for freedom, telling how I had run away from my masters house, taking food and some money, hoping to get far enough away that I might be safe. When I told him my masters name his expression changed, he was not angry but thoughtful.
Then he told me his story, his religious upbringing, how he had sought to obey the law, how zealous he had been to uphold it. He told me of his first encounter with Christians, how he hated their teaching thinking it to be blasphemy. He told me about the stoning of Stephen, and how Stephen had gone to his death courageously. He told me of his own meeting with Jesus on the Damascus road, of how his life was transformed, of how he was now free from the burden of the law because of the love of Jesus and the Holy Spirits transforming presence within him.
He told me of Jesus sacrifice on the cross, and of the true freedom to be found by all who would believe in him....
I was transfixed, the story was at once fantastic and compelling,
"True freedom" Paul said " comes from God, true freedom is not external, but internal, true freedom is found through a reconciliation with our creator, you can know that freedom." he said " But you must return to Philemons household, you must accept your place as his slave."
I was shocked, how could he ask such a thing of me?
Paul went on to explain that Philemon was also a believer, and that he would write asking him to receive me not as a slave but as a brother in Christ, he would ask him not to punish me, and that Paul himself would make good what I owed.
I was stunned, there was a choice before me, to receive true freedom I had to become a slave once again, the other choice was to continue to run, to continue my life of hiding.
Over the next few days I rested, and spent much time listening to Paul's teaching, his wisdom transcended anything I had heard before, when I said as much he declared that it was not his wisdom, but a wisdom that came from God himself.
Soon his letter was completed, he read it to me, I was amazed at what he was asking of my master, he asked him to receive me, to in effect be reconciled to me . He was asking me to humble myself in returning, but also to return as a brother, to live up to my name Onesimous - the useful one.
The choice was mine; I could be reconciled with my master Philemon, and also with my God, or I could continue to run and hide....
I chose to return, and was received with grace and mercy, I work now diligently for my brother and master, and like Paul I know the secret of true freedom does not depend on status or chains, but can be celebrated every day because we know that God is with us and in us.
