Family life

Yesterday I posted a small rant about the keen sailing members of this household- how sailing fever takes a firm grip. It was a moan because I was and am frustrated with them- I could really do with some help right now.

I also explained a little about my relationship with my parents and how that has been difficult.

I was wondering if I should delete those posts, but I am not going to, because they are real. We have good times as a family and we have frustrating times.

As a new Christian I felt everyone had it together but me, all the other families arrived at church on Sunday looking peaceful- I often felt frazzled and out of sorts. Their children would say the right things, Chris tried out his first swear word in church when he tripped up the Sunday school step- "Oh bugger"- hmmm , really that was not something we said on a regular basis, but our neighbours did!

I now know that some of them were just as wrung out as I was, and that I too looked calm!

We have dealt with problems of illness, of moving house, of moving countries twice, of employment and unemployment- and probably the hardest one problems with finances (that is a whole other story). But we have chosen to fight through the difficulties- oh yes sometimes literally- and not to give up because we are bound together by love- love for one another, love for our children, and most importantly and the one that has got us through love for God ...

As for my parents, they are my parents, they do not share the faith I have, and it would be easy to walk away and never see them again, but I cannot do that, so they are coming up for the weekend... and when they are here and when they go home I will continue to pray for them.

Families are frustrating at times, and yes there are days I want to walk off and leave, but I won't, for I know we will enjoy good times together, and love will not let me go...

So I pray for strength in the tough times, and for wisdom to know what is me and when I need to tackle the issue that is bugging me, I pray for peace in my home...and in myself for His grace is sufficient for me...

I know too that problems are not always simple to work through, and that there are times when the best thing to do would be to walk away. My own mother did that in the end, and it quite possibly saved her life, and that of my sister and I...

My father who was a brilliant engineer, became a violent drunk, he tried and tried to overcome his addiction but kept slipping back- life was too much for him, it left wounds in all of us, wounds that open again from time to time. I have found healing trough prayer, and I pray that one day mum and Becca will also...

No black and whites here, plenty of grey areas...

Psalm 18:18-24 (MsgB) 
        They hit me when I was down,
            but God stuck by me.
         He stood me up on a wide-open field;
            I stood there saved—surprised to be loved!
        God made my life complete
            when I placed all the pieces before him.
        When I got my act together,
            he gave me a fresh start.
       Now I'm alert to God's ways;
            I don't take God for granted.
         Every day I review the ways he works;
            I try not to miss a trick.
        I feel put back together,
            and I'm watching my step.
        God rewrote the text of my life
            when I opened the book of my heart to his eyes.